by Erin Owen | Apr 17, 2016 | Ezine
Our beloved 11-year old chocolate Labrador Zoe left us unexpectedly earlier this month. I am usually the first to say carpe diem (Live and love now! Don’t wait!), and the loss of Zoe provided another reminder of how short life can be.
I’ve written on this topic before, but felt it needed to be revisited. It’s so easy to get caught up in the distractions of the daily grind. It takes conscious effort–and sometimes the reminders from a friendly supporter–to keep the big picture and what’s most important fresh in your mind.
In my coaching of two business partners last week, we talked about how challenges like employee turnover and delayed closure of a key contract can cause you to forget your overarching vision. And in another coaching session with a business owner we talked about the importance of celebrating the small successes of daily work that build toward the bigger goals — important for staying the course even when unexpected challenges arise.
[dropshadowbox align=”center” effect=”lifted-both” width=”auto” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]What are you waiting to take action on? What distractions are drawing your attention away from what is most important?[/dropshadowbox]
One client recently re-hired me to help her tackle those distractions so she can stay on track toward her biggest growth goal. But sometimes the goals are more personal, like meeting that special someone…or taking a bucket list trip…or finally completing that next level licensing exam.
If you have not ever or not recently read the Top 5 Regrets of the Dying, as shared by a bedside hospice nurse Bronnie Ware in her now well-known observations, I invite you to read on and consider what small step you can take in the direction of a long-held goal or desire.
(1) I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
(2) I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
(3) I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
(4) I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
(5) I wish that I had let myself be happier.
Carpe diem!
by Erin Owen | Oct 7, 2014 | Ezine
It seems as though there have been a wave of deaths in the past few weeks.
My brother-in-law’s mother passed away, who he sadly had not seen in nearly a decade because of the restrictive policies of a dictatorial government in his home country.
One of my dear clients unbelievably lost a close colleague one week, then her father the following week.
Another client, who transforms loss into life—her work focuses on connecting the families of donors to organ transplant recipients—had to work with the families of a record-setting 7 organ donors in a single week.
A third client lost a close friend to cancer.
And that’t not all.
Losses come in many forms. Death. Bankruptcy. Divorce. Heartbreak. Lost opportunities.
But, what do we make of them? And what lessons and opportunities can we harvest from loss?
Let go.
Sadly, losses are one of the hardest teachers of the need to “let go.” Most losses are out of your control. While having control helps you to feel stable, steady, confident, secure, it is also a false front. The more you can learn to let go—especially of the “when” and “how” life unfolds, the less stress you will have and the more joy you’ll experience from the surprises that come unexpectedly.
Remember what is most important.
A loss forces you to pause and reflect upon what is most important in life. What that is might be different for you than for others, but often we are reminded about Love and Forgiveness and being present for the simple flow of everyday life—the details that weave their way in-between the birthdays and holidays and milestone events. Sadly, we are often painfully reminded of what we have taken for granted.
Carpe Diem.
Loss is a reminder that things can end at any moment and that you must live fully so you do not one day have regrets. So, what have you not yet done in life? Where do you want to travel? Who do you want to kiss? What leap of faith is calling to you? What change does your heart desire? Seize the day! Carpe diem!
In the practice of yoga, we are reminded of the importance of beginnings, middles and ends, as well as all the space in-between. In yoga, it is believed that without endings there can be no beginnings.
So, when appropriate and when possible, celebrate the endings—including the lives of those recently passed—to acknowledge the good and let go of the sadness—and invite in new life, new opportunity, new possibilities.
